Embracing Joy in the Pastor Wife Life with Barb Raveling

Today on the podcast, we’re diving into the topic of trials and finding joy with my friend, Barb Raveling. Joy is one of my favorite topics, especially as someone who has battled depression for years. When God delivered me from that, joy became incredibly precious to me because I had gone so long without it.

As a pastor’s wife, the enemy often tries to steal our joy. While this is true for any believer, it sometimes feels particularly intense in the pastor’s wife life. We face unique challenges as we love on God’s people and our families, and the enemy’s attacks can be relentless.

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Wisdom from Barb Raveling

Embracing Joy in the Pastor’s Wife Life

Pastors’ wives are often at the forefront of the church, and people can be unkind. The burdens of this role can be overwhelming. However, joy can be found by embracing what we do have rather than focusing on what we lack.

For example, instead of lamenting the lack of anonymity, embrace the opportunities to be deeply involved in ministry. Recognize the blessings in your unique role and find joy in the good things it brings. This shift in perspective can be incredibly powerful.

Expecting Trials and Finding Joy

It’s important to acknowledge that trials are inevitable. Life isn’t always a bowl of cherries, and ministry life is no exception. Some might assume that ministry is all glorious because of the divine calling, but those of us in it know it’s not always fun and games.

Human relationships, whether within the church or our families, are complex and often challenging. Since 2020, we’ve all faced unprecedented trials, and finding joy has been particularly difficult. However, understanding that trials are part of life can help us navigate them with a sense of peace and resilience.

Controlling What We Can

In facing trials, it’s helpful to ask ourselves what we can and cannot control. We often stress about things beyond our control, like other people’s actions. Instead, focus on what you can control—your attitude and response. Accepting what feels unacceptable and trusting God to walk with us through the scary unknowns can bring a profound sense of peace and joy.

Walking with God to Find Joy

Joy in the Bible comes through walking with the Spirit. It doesn’t come from perfection in ourselves, others, or our circumstances. The Apostle Paul learned to be content in all situations through Christ’s strength. This is a vital lesson for us as well.

One practical tool Barb uses is truth journaling. When stressed or discontent, she writes down her thoughts, identify any lies she might be believing, and counters them with God’s truth. This process helps her to capture my thoughts and align them with reality and God’s promises.

For more about Truth Journaling, click HERE.

Acknowledging Reality and Embracing Truth

Finding joy in trials is not about denying reality. We need to acknowledge our challenges and feelings. However, we must also embrace the greater truth of God. This balance of acknowledging reality while clinging to God’s truth is crucial. As we process our thoughts and feelings through this lens, we can find a way forward, even in difficult times.

Moving Beyond Denial

Denial doesn’t lead to healing. We need to confront our realities, but we must not stop there. Recognizing the lies we believe and replacing them with God’s truth transforms our thinking and helps us respond rightly.

Finding Growth in Trials

God can redeem our trials for good. These experiences can make us either bitter or better. Processing our struggles with God leads to growth and maturity. As we handle difficult situations, we become more like Christ and can positively impact our churches and communities.

A Testimony of Faith

One of the most profound testimonies of who God is can be seen through the joy we carry in the midst of trials. This joy is not just a beacon to the world but also to the person sitting next to us in church. When we respond to life’s challenges with joy, it opens a door for us to share about God and His unwavering presence in our lives.

Demonstrating Joy Amidst Trials

People notice how we respond to difficulties. When we exhibit joy in the face of trials, it speaks volumes—not about our strength but about the God we serve. This joy is a powerful testimony, offering us the chance to share our faith and the reason behind our joy.

A Testimony to Our Families

Living out our faith joyfully during trials is also a testimony to our children. They witness our growth and resilience, learning valuable lessons for their future challenges. When they see us draw near to God in difficult times, it equips them with the knowledge and faith to do the same.

The Struggle with Loneliness

For many pastors’ wives, loneliness is a significant challenge. It’s difficult to find friends who truly understand the unique aspects of pastoral life. However, finding joy in these inner conflicts is possible. One practical step is to reach out to other pastors’ wives in the community, forming small groups where mutual understanding and support can flourish.

Creative approaches to overcoming loneliness include staying connected with friends from previous communities and making efforts to find new friends both within and outside the church. Embracing vulnerability and letting others see inside can also help alleviate feelings of isolation.

Embracing Trials as Opportunities

Viewing trials as opportunities for growth can transform our perspective. Recognizing that God is like a coach rather than a fairy godmother helps us understand that maturity comes through active participation in our spiritual journey. Each trial is an opportunity to know Him more deeply.

Conclusion

In the end, joy is not merely an abstract concept but a tangible experience that comes from walking closely with God through every trial. It’s a testimony to His faithfulness and a light to those around us. As we navigate our own journeys, let us embrace each trial as an opportunity to grow in faith and joy, knowing that God is with us every step of the way.