Dwelling in Who God Says You Are with Carrie Brown | Episode 164
Have you ever felt like you’ve lost yourself somewhere along the way?
As pastor’s wives, we carry a unique weight. We love Jesus. We love our families. We love the church. And yet, between expectations, people-pleasing, and always being “on,” it’s easy to forget who we are beneath all the roles.
In this episode of The Pastor Wife Life Podcast, I sat down with Carrie Brown — a pastor’s wife and licensed marriage and family therapist — to talk about identity, mental health, boundaries, and what it really looks like to dwell in who God says we are.
God Hasn’t Lost You
One of the most freeing truths from this conversation is simple but powerful:
God hasn’t lost you — even if you feel lost.
Before expectations were placed on you, before titles were assigned, before opinions formed, God knew you. Your identity was never meant to be built on performance or approval, but on relationship.
Dwelling in who God says you are means staying rooted there — not visiting occasionally, not checking in when you’re exhausted, but choosing to live in His truth about you.
Identity, Mental Health, and the Pastor’s Wife Life
We also talked honestly about mental health and the church. Loving Jesus doesn’t make you immune to anxiety, burnout, or feeling overwhelmed. Faith and therapy are not opposites — they often work beautifully together.
Jesus Himself modeled rest, boundaries, and withdrawal from constant demand. Dwelling requires slowing down long enough to hear His voice over everyone else’s.
“Who Told You That?”
One question from this episode stands out:
Who told you that?
Who told you that you’re not enough?
Who told you that you can’t rest?
Who told you that saying no is selfish?
If a thought doesn’t line up with what God says about you, it isn’t truth. Dwelling in who God says you are means recognizing those lies and replacing them with His Word.
From Striving to Dwelling
Many pastor’s wives are exhausted not because they’re doing too much — but because they’re striving to meet expectations God never gave them.
Dwelling shifts us from:
- People-pleasing → God-pleasing
- Striving → resting
- Guilt → grace
- Performance → identity
You don’t have to earn your worth. You don’t have to prove your calling. You are already loved — right where you are.
A Gentle Invitation
If this episode resonated with you, don’t walk it out alone. Share it with another pastor’s wife. Listen together. Talk about what stood out. Encourage one another to dwell — not just in ministry responsibilities, but in the presence and truth of God.
You are seen.
You are known.
And your identity is secure in Christ.
Listen to the Episode
Connect with Carrie
carrie.brown@peacefulpathwaystherapy.com
Find Therapists and Psychologists in 74020 – If you’re local, you can find Carrie here!
Links We Mentioned
TherapistAid.com – a free resource for worksheets, blogs, videos, and tools related to mental health, identity, and CBT-style practices [website]
Let Me Be a Woman: Notes to My Daughter on the Meaning of Womanhood by Elizabeth Elliot – a foundational resource on womanhood, identity, faith, and marriage. [book]
Twenty Questions to Help You Navigate Negative Thoughts [PDF]
